Definition:
* the self-sustaining, positive feedback stream of complaining and lashing out, where she gets started on some small thing and then builds up momentum all by herself, without any further "fresh bad news" - positive feedback loop, anger priming and reinforcing more anger
Factors / Ingredients:
* negativistic personality - prone to complaining, expressing unhappiness, griping, blaming
* scapegoating - attributing most or all blame to a close person - partner / spouse, parent, child etc.
* emotional dysregulation - seeking conflict, confrontation instead of peace and reconciliation
* confirmation bias - becoming attuned to, looking for and noticing faults and failures in the other person, however small - every such fault found becomes one more confirmation of the negativity, a straw that broke camel's back
Hallmarks:
* disproportionate reaction to a small stimulus - stimulus acting as a fuse or a trigger of an avalanche
* universalizing statements - "always", "never", "again", "still" ( still haven't done something ), etc.
Effects:
* singularly unhelpful, destroys time, energy, productivity, morale
Unfavorable Outcome ( typical )
* adult temper tantrum
* conflict escalates to the maximum
* destructive actions - break dishes, discard other's things, divorce, sell the house
Favorable Outcome ( hypothetical ) - Everything Satisfied
* train / avalanche stopped soon enough, anger pacified
* but, not lasting long - what about next tasks ? goalposts moved.
* deeply internalized blame / anger / demands do not stop
* new, better situation is soon normalized and taken for granted, demands continue
* anger outbursts return
Metaphors / Symbolism
* Fisherman's Wife tale
See also - related:
* EVP - Emotionally Volatile Person ( this is a likely aspect of an EVP )
* FFM - Frustrated Family Member ( in an unhealthy way, exhibiting toxic / coercive behaviors - "nagging and yelling", beyond simply wanting something done ) - likely also engaging in this
* RDP - Resource Drain Pattern - this is a prime example of that - completely unnecessary, unproductive, theoretically avoidable
* FMRT - Finite Mental Resource Theory - Conflict being extremely costly in terms of FMR.